One only needs to read a few lines from poets such as Frost, Wordsworth, and Thoreau to recognize the love for and connection to nature human beings have always had. Nature stirs our souls and imagination and brings beauty to our everyday lives. But it turns out, nature also brings a slew of benefits to […]
One only needs to read a few lines from poets such as Frost, Wordsworth, and Thoreau to recognize the love for and connection to nature human beings have always had. Nature stirs our souls and imagination and brings beauty to our everyday lives. But it turns out, nature also brings a slew of benefits to our mental and physical health.
Research is now clearly indicating that spending time outdoors can have a positive impact on our health. Whether you bike, hike, or simply sit under a tree enjoying the sights and sounds, time in nature has shown to reduce stress, slow heart rate, improve pain, lower cortisol, and stimulate the immune system by boosting the production of natural killer cells that fight disease and infection.
In addition, time outside means time in the sun, and THAT means getting a nice boost of vitamin D, which can do everything from preventing disease, make our bones and teeth stronger, and improve our mood.
Ecotherapy, which is also sometimes referred to as nature therapy, is a practice in the emerging field of ecopsychology. The idea behind this practice is that many modern people, whether they are aware of it or not, feel a massive disconnect from the natural world. When you think about it, our ancestors spent hundreds of thousands of years living WITH nature, feeling it under their bare feet, being outside, ebbing and flowing with the shifts in seasons.
But today, most of us are only connected to a digital device. Ecotherapy gets us away from our screens and out into the beauty of the natural world. Many clinicians, including myself, believe that the earth has a natural ability to balance us. When we get back in touch with the systems of nature, we can experience improved mental health.
If you are feeling out of sorts and like the idea of trying ecotherapy, you can simply spend more time outside. If you would like someone to help you reconnect with nature, please get in touch with me. I am a big proponent of nature therapy and use it in my practice.
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We live in a society that values things that appear perfect. And I suppose there are things that can be perfect. Architects can draw the perfect straight line, mathematicians can solve an equation with a perfect calculation, and a chocolate cake can be perfectly moist. But as human beings, we can never reach a state […]
We live in a society that values things that appear perfect. And I suppose there are things that can be perfect. Architects can draw the perfect straight line, mathematicians can solve an equation with a perfect calculation, and a chocolate cake can be perfectly moist.
But as human beings, we can never reach a state of perfection because we will always be a work in progress. Perfection indicates a finality – a finished product – but we as humans are always growing and changing.
Many people view perfectionism as a positive attribute. They believe the more “perfect” they are, the more success they will have in life.
Perfectionism is NOT the same thing as always doing your best. It is important that we always do our best. By doing so, we can experience healthy achievements and growth. But perfectionism takes this concept to the extreme.
People with perfectionist tendencies often have self-defeating thoughts and/or behaviors that actually make it HARDER to achieve their goals. Perfectionism also can make the individual feel stress, anxiety, and depression.
Most human beings, from time to time, will strive for perfectionism in some aspect of their life. As an example, that “perfectly moist chocolate cake” I mentioned earlier got that way because the person who baked it was trying to get everything JUST RIGHT as a gift for someone’s birthday.
But there are those people who are “full-time” perfectionists. They strive for perfection in all aspects of their life.
Here are some signs you may be a perfectionist:
Again, perfectionism is not the same thing as doing your best. It is a condition whereby the individual is almost incapable of feeling joy or pride at what they accomplish because in their own minds, they are never quite good enough.
If you believe you may have traits of perfectionism and it is causing you stress, there are things you can do to change your behavior so you can live a healthier and happier life.
If you’d like to explore treatment options, please reach out to me.
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The statistics on teen suicide are staggering. According to the Centers for Disease Control, each year, an average of 8% of American teens will attempt suicide. This makes suicide the second leading cause of death for kids aged 10 to 24. In fact, it is believed that more teenagers die from suicide than from cancer, pneumonia, birth […]
The statistics on teen suicide are staggering. According to the Centers for Disease Control, each year, an average of 8% of American teens will attempt suicide. This makes suicide the second leading cause of death for kids aged 10 to 24. In fact, it is believed that more teenagers die from suicide than from cancer, pneumonia, birth defects, AIDS, influenza and heart disease combined.
Studies have found that teens who have presented with a mood disorder or who abuse drugs are at the greatest risk of attempting suicide. While research suggests girls attempt suicide more often, boys more often die from it.
Unfortunately, there is still much stigma surrounding depression and suicide, and so often these kids keep their emotional pain to themselves.
What can parents of teenagers do to keep their children safe and healthy?
Speak with Your Kid
Many parents believe that trying to speak with their kids about their moods and feelings will only push them farther away. This is a dangerous misconception. In reality, teenagers need to know they are safe, loved and cared for.
You may want to begin your conversation by asking general questions about what’s going on in their life. When the time feels right, you can ask if they have ever had thoughts of self-harm. If their answer alarms you, ask specifically if they are planning on or intending to harm themselves.
Validate Their Feelings
Once you’ve begun this sensitive dialogue with your teen, it’s important to actively listen and validate their feelings. Your kid must really believe you are a) hearing what they’re telling you and b) recognizing the importance of it. Try and listen without judgement. This will help your child relax and open up, thereby giving you an opportunity to learn even more about their inner emotional life.
Clarify the Situation
If your teen confides they are having thoughts of suicide, it’s incredibly important that you remain calm and ask questions that will help you clarify the situation. You will want to determine if they are mentioning suicide because they:
Seek Professional Guidance
Any talk of suicide is a serious matter and requires professional guidance by a trained therapist. It’s important not to force your teen into any treatment plan, but instead, allow them to help direct the course of their plan. Some of their depression might stem from an overall lack of control they feel they have in their own life, so it’s important you let them have a voice in the direction of treatment. You may also find that you will want to speak with someone through this difficult time.
If you or a loved one is seeking treatment options for a troubled teen, please be in touch. I would be more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help your family.
Dating is challenging for everyone. But when you suffer with depression, dating can feel scary and overwhelming. Not only do you feel particularly raw and vulnerable to possible rejection, but should a connection be made, you have the added burden of figuring out how and when to tell the person about your depression. Should people […]
Dating is challenging for everyone. But when you suffer with depression, dating can feel scary and overwhelming. Not only do you feel particularly raw and vulnerable to possible rejection, but should a connection be made, you have the added burden of figuring out how and when to tell the person about your depression.
Should people with depression date? If the person feels emotionally strong enough, then yes of course they should date. The real question is HOW should they date? If you are suffering with depression and are interested in dating, here are some things to consider when meeting new potential partners:
There is no need to open up to someone on a first date and let them know that you suffer with depression. You’ll want to invest a little bit of time to see if this person is someone you think you could get serious with.
If after a few dates you think he or she could be someone you’d like to go deeper with, then feel free to test the waters on the topic of depression. Don’t feel you have to get into nitty-gritty details; simply tell them that you live with depression and see how they react.
Your potential partner may have follow-up questions immediately or they may think about things for a while and then bring up some questions later. Whenever they do, be honest with your answers.
It will be tempting to want to downplay things in order to put your best self forward. But not being honest about your symptoms and reality will backfire eventually. Let them know you have good days and bad and if you are currently taking medications and/or seeing a therapist. Answer as many questions as you feel comfortable with, but when you do, just be sure to be honest and not pretend you are someone you’re not.
Everyone has dating pitfalls and patterns, and people with depression are no different. It’s important that you respect past dating failures so you can prevent them from happening again. For instance, did you tend to date people who made you feel bad about yourself? If you find you’re doing it again, call things off and take some time to regroup.
Seeking the help from a licensed therapist can help you work out any issues you have that are hindering your relationships. If you notice you keep repeating past mistakes, try and talk with someone who can help you navigate your own behavior.
If you or a loved one suffers from depression and would like to explore treatment options, please be in touch. I’d be more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help.
When talking about depression, a lot of people forget that depression is an illness that requires proper attention and treatment. If you’re depressed, it can be incredibly frustrating to hear things like “Just get over it”, “You’re being really dramatic”, “You have to be strong”, “Learn to deal with it”, “Happiness is a choice”. You […]
When talking about depression, a lot of people forget that depression is an illness that requires proper attention and treatment. If you’re depressed, it can be incredibly frustrating to hear things like “Just get over it”, “You’re being really dramatic”, “You have to be strong”, “Learn to deal with it”, “Happiness is a choice”. You might start to think of things like ‘Why can’t I just get over it’? We can stop ourselves from doing destructive things like putting our hand in a fire, but when it comes to depression, it’s a bit difficult to just ‘stop’. There are a number of reasons why ‘get over it’ statements like this don’t help. Here are some of the best reasons why.
Depression is real and painful. Just because you can’t see or touch it doesn’t make it any less real. If you suffer from depression or know someone who does, working with a therapist is a good start to overcoming your depression. I am available to help. Contact me to book a therapy session.
Some people turn to self-injury or harm in response to emotional distress. These non-suicidal injuries are a way for a person to mirror psychological pain with physical pain.
Some people turn to self-injury or harm in response to emotional distress. These non-suicidal injuries are a way for a person to mirror psychological pain with physical pain.
But, as the person on the outside, witnessing self-harm to a loved one can be confusing and scary. The tendency is to jump to the idea that this person was trying to commit suicide when that is not usually the intent.
1.) Feeling pain can provide a distraction from what they are thinking. It focuses their attention on their physical feelings rather than thoughts and strong emotions. It allows them to regain some control.
2.) This intentional physical harm can provide a temporary calming effect, allowing them to release some of the tension associated with their strong emotions.
3.) It can be a way of “feeling something” when the person is emotionally numb or dissociated.
4.) It can be a form of expression when the person doesn’t know another way to communicate or document their strong emotions.
5.) A form of punishment. If they feel they are undeserving or have done something wrong this can be how they punish themselves.
6.) Self-harm can provide a temporary but intense feeling of euphoria immediately after.
Self-harm is not something you just see in movies. It is actually relatively common, so common in fact that March has been named Self-Injury Awareness Month. It is estimated that as many as 17 percent of teenagers and 5 percent of adults will experience some form of self-injury, according to the American Psychological Association. Self-injury commonly includes skin cutting, headbanging or hitting, and/or flesh burning.
Self-injury is not a healthy coping mechanism. It is not a sustainable way of managing emotions and/or relieving stress. It can cause permanent damage to a person’s body and puts them at risk for infection and death, if gone too far. It is important that if you suspect someone is inflicting self-harm they be provided the proper mental help so they can heal.
Those who inflict self-harm often find ways to hide their injuries from others. They choose places on their bodies that are easily covered with clothing and hide any tools they may use to inflict harm. That is why it is important to know the signs.
All mental health struggles carry some stigma causing people to be anxious or avoidant in seeking the help they need. But, self-harm carries even more embarrassment for the person. Often they will feel like they have no one to talk to or will feel ashamed at what they have done to their body. They will struggle to come forward about their problem because of their embarrassment.
People who turn to self-harm can be labeled attention-seeking, which only exasperates the problem. If you suspect someone you care about is struggling with self-harm be gentle, open, and careful in how you approach the topic. Let them know you are a safe place and you want to get them help. They need to feel comfortable confiding in you.
If someone is inflicting harm on themselves what they really need is support. They need to feel safe and not alone in their struggles. Help them to seek out a mental health counselor who they are comfortable with. Offer love and a listening, comforting ear, rather than judgment. You probably don’t understand why they are hurting themselves and that is ok. Do your best to stay calm and open-minded to their circumstances. It can also be helpful for you to seek counseling services for yourself to help you cope during these worrisome times.
Ready to begin counseling in Pennsylvania?
Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. We are here for you.
Valentine’s day is just around the corner. For many people that means celebrating with their spouse or partner and showing them extra love and attention. But for others, Valentine’s Day is a sad reminder that they are single or are perhaps grieving the recent loss of their significant other. If you are celebrating it alone […]
Valentine’s day is just around the corner. For many people that means celebrating with their spouse or partner and showing them extra love and attention. But for others, Valentine’s Day is a sad reminder that they are single or are perhaps grieving the recent loss of their significant other.
If you are celebrating it alone this year, here are a few ways you can alleviate your sadness this Valentine’s Day.
It’s bad enough to feel lonely, but it’s even worse to scold yourself for doing so. Loneliness is not an indication that you’re doing anything wrong or that there is something wrong and unlovable about you.
Even people that are in relationships can feel incredibly lonely. Loneliness affects everyone at some point in their life. It’s not a sin to feel this way, so stop scolding yourself.
How many times during the year do you make a real effort to show yourself love? If you’re like most people, you don’t really think much about how you treat yourself.
This Valentine’s Day, if you find yourself a party of one, try and make the best of it by focusing all of your love and attention on yourself. Take yourself out to a nice dinner. Or, if you don’t like the idea of sitting at a table alone surrounded by couples, then order in your favorite food and watch your favorite movie.
Take a nice long bath. Listen to your favorite band. Buy yourself a little gift on the way home from work. Use this Valentine’s Day to commit to showing yourself more love and kindness throughout the year.
Valentine’s Day is a holiday to show love. No one says that love must be shown in a romantic way.
This is a great time to show your affection and appreciation for the wonderful people in your life. Get your best friend a box of chocolates or your mom a bouquet of flowers. Put a card on your neighbor’s windshield and your coworker’s computer monitor.
You can be filled with love by being loved, and you can be filled with love by loving others. The more love YOU show this holiday, the more love you will feel inside. And you would be amazed at how the loneliness quickly slips away when you are full of love.
Don’t let the commercialism of the holiday make you feel alone and isolated. You really can have a lovely Valentine’s day if you love yourself and others.
It is estimated that as many as 10 million Americans struggle with seasonal depression each year, while many more face the winter blues, according to Psychology Today. Bring with that the social isolation, fear, and despair brought on by COVID-19 and you might be feeling more depressed and hopeless than ever before. Here are some tips to ease your winter blues.
For some people, the winter months are a time to embrace, whether it be a love of skiing or other outdoor sports, or a desire to snuggle up with a cozy blanket and a book by the fire. But, for many, the cold months of winter are a struggle to get motivated, find energy and, overall, a time of feeling down and depressed.
It is estimated that as many as 10 million Americans struggle with seasonal depression each year, while many more face the winter blues, according to Psychology Today. Bring with that the social isolation, fear, and despair brought on by COVID-19 and you might be feeling more depressed and hopeless than ever before.
The good news is there are ways to help yourself feel better and get through the winter months and on to happier, brighter times. What can you do to ease the winter blues and combat Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) this year?
The winter blues and seasonal depression are similar but Seasonal Affective Disorder (or SAD) is more severe. If you find that you are always struggling with depression, low mood, irritability, anxiety, fatigue, lack of energy, hopelessness, and despair at the same time every year then you may have SAD. People with SAD may disconnect from family and friends, lose interest in the things they once enjoyed, have difficulty concentrating, oversleep, or have muscle tension or stomach problems.
If you have severe symptoms of SAD or are struggling to pull yourself out of a depressed state then consider seeking the help of a licensed mental health professional. A trained counselor or therapist can help you work through this time and develop healthy coping mechanisms.
Even if going out in the cold is the last thing you want to do, getting a little fresh air can do wonders for your mood and mental health. Layer up and go for a short 20-minute walk each day to keep unpleasant feelings at bay. You can also make it fun—go sledding, ice skating, or snowshoeing. Build a snowman with your kids or engage them in a snowball fight. You will be amazed at how good it can make you (and them) feel.
Lack of sunlight is what makes this time of the year so challenging. It is also why we need to do our best to get as much sun as possible. Open curtains and blinds on sunny days and let it all in. Go for walks in the sun. Find a sunny spot near a window to read a book. If it is possible, consider taking a vacation to a warmer, sunnier spot during the worst of the winter months.
Another helpful tool for many SAD sufferers is light therapy. You can purchase special lights that help to mimic sunlight and use those a few minutes a day on the darkest days.
It can be easy to let old routines fall by the wayside in hard times. Do your best to keep your routine to help prevent yourself from falling too deep into depression. Wake up at the same time as you usually do, eat at the same time, keep the same exercise schedule. As unmotivated as you might be, keeping this routine will help keep your mental health in check.
Whether it be alcohol, carbohydrates, or fatty foods, whatever you crave during times of unrest do your best to avoid overindulging. Yes, that donut or martini might provide a little mood boost to start but too much can leave you feeling crummy. Overindulging in unhealthy habits can have a big impact on your overall mental health.
Humans need connection. Whether it be in-person, over the phone, Facetime, or even letter writing. We all thrive on connecting with others. So, as tempted as you might be to shut yourself off from the rest of the world and go into hibernation—don’t. Staying connected and busy, having meaningful interactions with others, are the things that are going to help keep you well.
Getting into a habit of regular meditation and mindfulness can help you to better regulate your emotions. We spend so much time worrying about things that happened yesterday or things we have to get done tomorrow that we miss all the things right in front of us. Being mindful can help us appreciate the little things, soak up the small moments, and not get as overwhelmed worrying about what is coming next.
There is no doubt the last few months have been some of the most challenging for many of us. Now, faced with seasonal depression you might feel like this is never-ending. But, the truth is, this won’t last forever. All of these challenges are teaching you to be more resilient than ever before.
If you are struggling with how to combat the winter blues or other struggles in your life, don’t hesitate to get help. The sooner you get the help you need, the sooner you can get back to feeling healthy and happy.
Searching For Online Counseling In Pennsylvania?
Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. We are here for you.
Certain emotions can be hard for anyone to process, but even more so for children. What are some signs your child is struggling?
Certain emotions can be hard for anyone to process, but even more so for children. They might not know how to react when they feel a certain way, so, as a parent, it is important to be aware of other signs your child may be struggling.
The signs are not always obvious. Instead of telling you how they feel, they might act out in behavioral ways or complain of physical discomforts.
The best thing you can do is pay attention. Note any sudden shifts in mood, behavior, or physical symptoms. These can be indicators your child could use some help coping. And, listen to your gut. Parents tend to have a sense something isn’t right.
The past few months, living during a global pandemic COVID-19, have been particularly challenging with everything being canceled and closed down. Now, as we begin another school year and our children and teens take on education in a new way—whether in-person or remote— it is perfectly normal for them to be having a hard time.
They might be mad that they have to wear a mask or confused as to why they can’t be in school with their friends. They might feel anxious about getting sick.
Whatever it is that is ailing them, what are some signs to watch for?
There are lots of reasons your child might be struggling, COVID-related and beyond. They might be upset they didn’t make a sports team, frustrated or confused by things going on within the home, sad about something with friends, or feeling depressed and not knowing why.
As a parent you probably wish you could take their pain and frustration away, you want to fix things, but you might not know how.
1.) Recognize Anxiety is Contagious. Sometimes without even realizing we project our feelings onto those around us. If you are feeling anxious yourself, look inward, try to find your calm so you don’t pass on those anxious feelings to your children. Deep breathing exercises, mindfulness, and meditation can be helpful. You may also want to consider counseling services for yourself so you can better work through your own struggles.
2.) Validate Your Child’s Feelings. Does what they are going through stink? It sure does. Talk to your child. Tell them it’s ok to feel angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed, etc. Whatever they are struggling with is ok. They don’t need to hide it from you. Help them to feel comfortable opening up about their struggles. Explain that they are not alone. Give them space to grieve.
3.) Avoid Referencing the Bigger Picture. Saying things like “life isn’t fair” or “we have to do this to keep others safe” aren’t going to help your child. Developmentally their worldview revolves around them, their friends, and their family.
4.) Stay Calm. If your child is emotionally unraveling it can be hard as a parent to keep your cool. You want them to relax but saying “just relax” is not the most helpful response. Instead, try to maintain your calm, be a listening ear. Coach them, point out the positives, tell them to breathe.
5.) Be Flexible. If your child struggles with anxiety they might not want to do something that you think they should be doing. Try to have some flexibility but also maintain a normal routine. Extra planning for transitions can be helpful as well. Maybe they need a little extra time or a pep talk.
6.) Modify Expectations & Praise Them for Accomplishments. During stressful times we all can have trouble getting things done. Modify your expectations for your child during challenging times and praise them for little things. For example at the end of a stressful e-learning day, tell them you are proud of them for sticking with it even though you know it was hard.
7.) Get Help. If your child is struggling consider getting them help. Online therapy options are available to connect your child to a therapist virtually. Counseling services can help teach your child ways to cope and manage their stress and disappointment in a healthy way. It is also good for parents to get the help they need so they are better able to support their child during these difficult times.
And, don’t forget to practice self-care. You also need breaks and an occasional reset to feel your best. You need to take care of yourself to take care of your child in the best way possible.
Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. We are here for you.
For those struggling with depression—new or chronic—COVID-19 has compounded symptoms and made treatment feel more out of reach.
As I sit here writing this blog post I can’t help but feel a little down. These times are tough for everyone. Disappointment is all around us, fear of the unknown, financial struggles, concerns about our children and school, isolation as we try to be socially responsible, and anxiety over the potential of getting sick. For those struggling with depression—new or chronic—COVID-19 has compounded symptoms and made treatment feel more out of reach.
The good news is online therapy is available and many insurance companies have made changes to their plans to include coverage for online services, making treatment more easily accessible. But even so, we could all use some tips on how to manage depression during these unprecedented and extremely trying times.
It’s ok to be sad. It is ok to be upset that schools are closed or events are canceled. It is normal to be disappointed that your favorite store had to shut down or you can’t enjoy your favorite summer festival. Don’t try to minimize your feelings. Instead, let yourself feel them. Allow yourself space to process and move towards acceptance.
You might be physically isolated from social situations right now but you don’t have to give in to complete isolation. Find other ways to connect, even if it is a chat with your neighbor through the fence. Phone calls and video conferencing are both helpful tools to keep you feeling connected. Human contact is crucial to everyone’s mental health and can help depression sufferers tremendously.
Identify friends, family members, or counseling professionals you can turn to in times of vulnerability. Everyone should have a person they trust who will be understanding and empathetic to their feelings.
Being stuck at home and bored can cause us to spend more time scrolling social media or watching news shows. Try to limit the amount of time spent absorbing this information. There is a lot out there and it can feel overwhelming and difficult to process. Pay attention to how you feel when you are on these networks—if it isn’t good, then cut yourself off.
Routine and structure are important to your mental wellbeing. With all the changes in our day-to-day, it can be tempting to sleep-in each morning, skip the shower and stay in our sweats. Establishing some kind of healthy balance and structure can help to keep your depressive symptoms in check—even if that means having one pair of yoga pants for relaxing and another for working.
A loss in structure often results in letting go of healthy habits like exercise, sleep, and eating healthy foods. Having a daily exercise routine and a healthy eating plan can keep you feeling your best and help with emotional regulation. Not to mention, getting that heart rate up can help you to burn off some steam and release stress.
Depression often leaves you feeling fatigued and unmotivated but by forcing yourself to do things even if you don’t want to, your mood can benefit. For example, you don’t have the energy to take the dog on a walk but you set an alarm and make yourself do it when it goes off, in turn, you might notice an improvement in your mood and have more motivation to do other things.
Fresh air and Vitamin D are so important for our bodies and minds. Consider moving your home office to the back porch for part of the day, or add a morning walk to your routine. If you are feeling overwhelmed or claustrophobic getting outside can relieve those feelings.
It can be easy to let normal routines go (including that weekly counseling appointment) when schedules are unraveled and we are forced into isolation. But, seeking help from a licensed mental health professional can offer a lot of benefits. And, if you were already receiving some kind of counseling services it is important to continue treatment.
Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. You don’t have to manage depression on your own. We are here for you.
