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    mourn loss of experiences

    Why it is Ok to Mourn Loss of Experiences

    November 30, 2020

    Tips for you and your children on dealing with disappointment I think it’s fair to say that 2020 has been the year of disappointment and even with a vaccine on the horizon that disappointment feels never-ending. Everything from birthday parties, family events and concerts to school, sports, and well, normal life has been canceled. And, […]

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    Why it is Ok to Mourn Loss of Experiences

    November 30, 2020

    Tips for you and your children on dealing with disappointment

    I think it’s fair to say that 2020 has been the year of disappointment and even with a vaccine on the horizon that disappointment feels never-ending. Everything from birthday parties, family events and concerts to school, sports, and well, normal life has been canceled. And, now as the holiday season is in full swing, you might be feeling an extra punch to the gut over the loss of experiences. 

    Whatever You are Feeling is OK

    You are probably feeling a whole slew of different emotions — sadness, grief, anxiety, depression, guilt, fear, regret, hope, and gratitude, to name a few. Whatever you are feeling, it is ok. It is ok to be upset at everything that isn’t happening. It is ok to grieve and mourn the loss of experiences. Grief isn’t just something you feel when you lose someone you love, it can be a healthy part of healing from any traumatic experience—something 2020 has given us a fair share of. If you are struggling with accepting the emotions you are feeling, give in. Let yourself feel so you can heal and keep moving forward. 

    child mourn loss of experiences

    Besides allowing yourself to feel, what are some other ways for you and your family to deal with all this disappointment?

    Remember, Anxiety is Contagious 

    When trying to help your children as they struggle through all their disappointment, it is important to remember that anxiety is contagious. If you are stressing over all the things your children will pick up on it. But, the same is said for feelings of calm. If you have a calm demeanor your children will feel that and will likely be able to process things easier. 

    This is why it is important to check-in with yourself frequently. Take the time to process your own emotions and find your calm before addressing your children—that way you can approach the situation as calmly and level-headed as possible. 

    Validate Emotions

    Acknowledge that whatever feelings you or your children are feeling is normal and completely acceptable. When your child is sad that they can’t have a birthday party or playdate, name their emotions — “you are sad, and that is ok.” Explain they are not alone. Everyone is dealing with severe disappointment right now. 

    It is also important to remember that a child is at a different developmental stage than an adult. Using the bigger picture to explain why things are the way they are to your child is likely not going to be well received. Saying things like “we need to stay home so hospitals don’t get overcrowded” is not something a child will understand. Children’s worldview revolves around them, their friends and family. 

    in this together

    Embrace the Learning Opportunity

    In every difficult time, there is a silver lining. Your child is learning a lot of valuable skills for managing stress and disappointment. They are learning how to be flexible and more resilient than ever. Use this time to teach them healthy ways to face their emotions. Teach them about self-care, talking or writing things down, and how to calm down when upset. 

    Be Each Other’s Sounding Board 

    Being a listening ear for your children and other family members is the most important thing you can do for each other. Talk out your frustrations. Validate each other’s emotions. Then, focus on something fun you can do instead— make breakfast for dinner, play a board game, paint or do other crafts, movie night, build an epic pillow fort, or spend some time outside.  

    Use what resources you have to find ways to connect with those outside of your home. Set up virtual gatherings. Check-in with those you haven’t spoken to in a while.

    parents listening

    Plan for the Future

    Having something exciting to look forward to can be a huge help in getting through hard times. Right now making plans for the future may seem futile but things won’t be like this forever. Check out some fun vacation spots and start saving for a trip you may be able to make when things start to clear up. Make a list of experiences you want to do in the future. Focus all that grief energy on something productive and fulfilling.

    Practice Self-Care

    Self-care is important all the time but even more so during times of high stress. The best thing you can do for yourself and others in your life is to take care of you. Spend some time doing things that bring your joy. Go for a walk, take a bath, read a book, cuddle up with a movie, chat with friends, plan an at-home date night with your partner. Also remember to take care of your health, get sleep, eat well, avoid overindulging in alcohol or unhealthy foods that are just going to make you feel crummy. 

    self-care mourn loss

    Seek help when you need it. Consider doing some online therapy with a counselor or therapist. They can help guide you through your disappointment and grief. 

    And, remember this is just a blip on the story of your life. You will get through these hard times. 

    Searching For Online Counseling In Pennsylvania?

    Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. We are here for you.

    Filed Under: Parenting Tagged With: anxiety, coronavirus, covid19, depression, grief, help, loss of experience, mourn, parenting, self-care

    child struggling

    Signs Your Child Is Struggling and How to Help

    September 10, 2020

    Certain emotions can be hard for anyone to process, but even more so for children. What are some signs your child is struggling?

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    Signs Your Child Is Struggling and How to Help

    September 10, 2020

    Certain emotions can be hard for anyone to process, but even more so for children. They might not know how to react when they feel a certain way, so, as a parent, it is important to be aware of other signs your child may be struggling.

    The signs are not always obvious. Instead of telling you how they feel, they might act out in behavioral ways or complain of physical discomforts. 

    The best thing you can do is pay attention. Note any sudden shifts in mood, behavior, or physical symptoms. These can be indicators your child could use some help coping. And, listen to your gut. Parents tend to have a sense something isn’t right.

    Coping With COVID

    The past few months, living during a global pandemic COVID-19, have been particularly challenging with everything being canceled and closed down. Now, as we begin another school year and our children and teens take on education in a new way—whether in-person or remote— it is perfectly normal for them to be having a hard time.

    They might be mad that they have to wear a mask or confused as to why they can’t be in school with their friends. They might feel anxious about getting sick.

    Whatever it is that is ailing them, what are some signs to watch for?

    Physical signs your child is stressed:

    • Headaches
    • Upset Stomach
    • Chest Pain
    • Heart palpitations or increased heart rate
    • Insomnia
    • Nightmares
    • Bedwetting
    • Decreases in appetite, comfort-eating, or binge eating
    • Pretending to be sick to avoid certain activities

    Emotional signs your child is stressed:

    • Anxious
    • Mood swings
    • Restlessness
    • Clinginess
    • New or recurring fears
    • Increased crying, anger, stubbornness, or aggression
    • Decreased concentration or motivation
    • Emotional overreactions to minor events
    • Regressing toward comforting behaviors like thumb-sucking, nail-biting, or sleeping with a stuffed animal
    • Social isolation, withdrawal, or unwillingness to participate in activities they used to enjoy

    There are lots of reasons your child might be struggling, COVID-related and beyond. They might be upset they didn’t make a sports team, frustrated or confused by things going on within the home, sad about something with friends, or feeling depressed and not knowing why. 

    child struggling

    As a parent you probably wish you could take their pain and frustration away, you want to fix things, but you might not know how. 

    How can you help?

    1.) Recognize Anxiety is Contagious. Sometimes without even realizing we project our feelings onto those around us. If you are feeling anxious yourself, look inward, try to find your calm so you don’t pass on those anxious feelings to your children. Deep breathing exercises, mindfulness, and meditation can be helpful. You may also want to consider counseling services for yourself so you can better work through your own struggles.

    2.) Validate Your Child’s Feelings. Does what they are going through stink? It sure does. Talk to your child. Tell them it’s ok to feel angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed, etc. Whatever they are struggling with is ok. They don’t need to hide it from you. Help them to feel comfortable opening up about their struggles. Explain that they are not alone. Give them space to grieve.

    3.) Avoid Referencing the Bigger Picture. Saying things like “life isn’t fair” or “we have to do this to keep others safe” aren’t going to help your child. Developmentally their worldview revolves around them, their friends, and their family. 

    4.) Stay Calm. If your child is emotionally unraveling it can be hard as a parent to keep your cool. You want them to relax but saying “just relax” is not the most helpful response. Instead, try to maintain your calm, be a listening ear. Coach them, point out the positives, tell them to breathe. 

    parent with struggling child

    5.) Be Flexible. If your child struggles with anxiety they might not want to do something that you think they should be doing. Try to have some flexibility but also maintain a normal routine. Extra planning for transitions can be helpful as well. Maybe they need a little extra time or a pep talk. 

    6.) Modify Expectations & Praise Them for Accomplishments. During stressful times we all can have trouble getting things done. Modify your expectations for your child during challenging times and praise them for little things. For example at the end of a stressful e-learning day, tell them you are proud of them for sticking with it even though you know it was hard. 

    7.) Get Help. If your child is struggling consider getting them help. Online therapy options are available to connect your child to a therapist virtually. Counseling services can help teach your child ways to cope and manage their stress and disappointment in a healthy way. It is also good for parents to get the help they need so they are better able to support their child during these difficult times.

    And, don’t forget to practice self-care. You also need breaks and an occasional reset to feel your best. You need to take care of yourself to take care of your child in the best way possible. 

    Searching For Online Counseling In Pennsylvania?

    Counselors at CW Psychological Services are professionally-trained and licensed. We have openings for online, or telehealth, therapy appointments. Email us at info@cwpsychologicalservices.com or call at (610) 308-7575. We are here for you. 

    Filed Under: Adolescents/Teens, Anxiety, Children, Depression, Parenting, Teens/Children Tagged With: anxiety, behavioral, child, children, covid-19, depression, help, mental, parenting, physical, stress, stressed, struggling, support, tantrum



    491 Allendale Road Suite 301
    King of Prussia, PA 19406
    (610) 308-7575

    info@cwpsychologicalservices.com

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    CW Psychological Services
    info@cwpsychologicalservices.com (610) 308-7575
    491 Allendale Road. Suite 301
    King of Prussia, PA 19406

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